The NFL is becoming a league full of a bunch of wimps and cry babies, its been happening over time.
What else will they change?
I wouldn't be surprised if the term 'tackle' is deemed to "rough" a word by our ever feminist turning weakling society, they will instead call it 'stopping your opponents penatration of your protected area'.
Lets rename the football, lets call it a 'Cuddle Hide'. No wait its made out of leather and that kills cows, lets have someone Cross Stitch the footballs and make them smaller and call them "Cradled Cushies".
Lets get rid of tackling and replace it with Bingo. Thats right a play starts and there are hundreds of 80 year old women on either sidline and they will start playing super speed bingo and then when one of them gets bingo the play will stop.
Of course we will do away with running, because as we all know you can get hurt running, so instead all the players will speed walk. You know what speed walking is right? Seen it? Thats the definition of feminine.
Next, we will replace Al and John with Oprah and Marth Stewart!
Then of course there will be no more football on sundays because it would interfere with church, and no more late games because we don't want to keep the kids up. So the games will be played in the afternoons monday through firday.
And finally we will allow women to play, because, there will be no reason not to.
"Welcome people to your daily afternoon Cradled Cushies event, I'm Martha Stewart, and sitting next to me is Oprah Wimpy! Today we will have an exciting encounter between the Chicago Plush Kittens and the Dallas Soy Burger Eaters"
"Thats right Martha this should be a great match up, it looks like the Soy Burger Eaters have won the cutest baby contest so they will cradling the cushy first!"
"Rowanda-Martinez-Sanchez-Gabaloz-Hernando starts from her own territory and look at her speed walk, that is some nice speed walking she has going on there. Look at her form even with those 57 inch hips she looks good in this type of situation. Oprah the Plush Kitten's bingo ladies can't seem to get a bingo, could this be a opening game stroll that goes all the way for a score?" "Oprah?" "Oprah?"
"Damn Oprah is over at the buffett table again. Oh well the bingo ladies finally have called bingo, but the Soy Burger Eaters are already in Plush Kitten territory."
"They start there second gate, as we all know each team gets two chances to penetrate the other teams "special area" and score a "TOUCH-UP" where they not only get a point but the also get to make sure thier makeup still looks good"
"Ricky Focker will be the second walker for the Soy Burger Eaters, he has started and he looks to be on a fine walk with one hand stroking the Craddled Cushy and the other pointed straight out to his side swinging back and forth as stiff as a board."
"Ricky is a crowd favorite because he talks with such a sweet voice that we all love to interview him and our whole feminist society loves the sweet music that his beautiful voice gives off."
"Oh we have another bingo but it seems Ricky has penetrated the Plush Kittensspecial area!! Randy, Simon and Paula are dileberating. Yes!!! It seems he has SCORED by penetrating the Plush Kittens special area!!"
"We will now pause for a commercial that will refer to a "not so fresh feeling" followed by laundy soap and diaper commercials.. Thank you for joining us!!"
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Book of Cash Chapter 2: Verse 11- Do not PM or IM me until you have exhausted every other way.
First off, an opinion cannot be wrong....its an OPINION
Ok, good. In my opinion, you're an idiot. Good thing I can't be wrong!
Timothy 2:12
Seriously tho, The NFL is sissafying the league and the players. im all for making it possibly safer...but im not for elimating certain types of tackles cos they caused a few injuries. and arent cowardly or rough. Things like those blocks from behind the chop blocks i think they are called like the guy from denver did...you elimate that...but a horse collar tackle...piss off.
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Ricky "The Hitman" Hatton:44-1, 31 KOs
David "The Hayemaker" Haye:21-1, 20 KOs
Undisputed World Cruiserweight Champion (WBA, WBC, WBO, The Ring Magazine Champion)
that ahd me rolling and it is so true...you can have the suckiest player out there, but the women in your home will say, "oh I like him, his butt is cute" or something...lol...those are men, lets get back to the ole days!!!
Hah...we may have differing opinions over the new rule, but this is hilarious either way. And I agree to a certain extent, especially that "no contact" rule that was enforced last year. They pretty much handed that damn record to Peyton Manning. Nice work Cash, that had me rolling!
Seriously tho, The NFL is sissafying the league and the players. im all for making it possibly safer...but im not for elimating certain types of tackles cos they caused a few injuries. and arent cowardly or rough. Things like those blocks from behind the chop blocks i think they are called like the guy from denver did...you elimate that...but a horse collar tackle...piss off.
Oh man, you're killing me over here cash. But I totally agree with you and everyone else. Hard hits that make you say "ooooooh" are what makes the game so great.
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l 1 KC Chief Super Bowl Championship l - l 1 KC Royals World Series Title l - l 2 Kansas University Jayhawk NCAA Basketball Chamionships l
Hey Cash... this is hilarious... WHERE DO YOU COME UP WITH THIS STUFF??
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Disturbed
The simple fact is that he is a over rated piece of **** that can't cover. He makes bad reads on routes and lacks the ability to recover when he is beaten.
For Madden people the best way to explain it is that he has a very low awareness.
