When do you step in?

SenorMatt24 · #1 (**permalink**) 07-19-2006

I was listening to the radio this morning when they started talking about a story from the Dallas Morning News... (http://www.dallasnews.com/sharedcont...1.240e272.html)
To understand what I'm talking about you may need to read the story

As I was listening, I started wondering, not just in this case, but in others... What point do you step in... Now, I understand that some of you may say "of course you step in" or "Hey, using a belt isn't that bad" or whatever... My point isn't really concerned with this story, but more like how far is too far... In this case, would you step in, and/or call the police, or do you say, I don't know the situation, its up to them, or what? If not, what would cause you to step in.. Secondly, is the case any different if its between a husband and wife (or boyfriend/girlfriend) versus this situation with a 2 year old... What does it take for you to say I need to do something about this...?

cashpath · #2 (**permalink**) 07-19-2006

It's not cut and dry.. In that case.. yeah you step in.. that's pretty clear...

I think a smack on the *** with an open hand is a sufficient spanking for a 2 year old and most kids older than that can start to be punished without violence.. there are things that mean more to the kids than a pain in the *** once they get older.

If someone is hitting someone else who can't defend themselves regardless of who it is... then yeah.. you step in..

Now at 6'0 225 lbs it might be a little easier for me to step in thean it is for soemone else... but.. even if it was a 260 lb skinhead beating his kid.. I'de step in (unless it would put my kids in danger.. sorry but I care about my kids more than some kid I don't know.. and would just call the cops if there could be danger to my kids..) If I got my *** beat oh well..

Tigam · #3 (**permalink**) 07-19-2006

First and foremost...

I don't have a problem with spanking. I don't have a problem with using the belt. It was done to me. I understand now.

With that said... A two year old. I'd have taken that ****ing belt away from her and beat her with hit. Feel free to call the police. I have zero problem with that. I'll take my smack on the hand.

Quote:

Now at 6'0 225 lbs it might be a little easier for me to step in thean it is for soemone else... but.. even if it was a 260 lb skinhead beating his kid.. I'de step in (unless it would put my kids in danger.. sorry but I care about my kids more than some kid I don't know.. and would just call the cops if there could be danger to my kids..) If I got my *** beat oh well..

Well... If I was with you wouldn't have to. Then again... A boy that big if I don't take him down right away I expect you to at least pick me up and carry me home afterwards.

SlickRick1382 · #4 (**permalink**) 07-19-2006

I agree with Tigam... I caught a couple spankings and a belt here and there and I turned out just fine (this block contains no sarcasm =) )

Then again my whipping weren't cruel or anything. At two years old I think that's just plain wrong and would of stepped in and said something/done something.

TheBillster · #5 (**permalink**) 07-19-2006

I never have noticed a situation like that, but i think i would step in too.
Iam trying always to be the good guy, and in this case to make the woman stop beating her child is a good thing to do.
But if the person who beats the child looks like strong or dangerous i might ask other persons for assistance for the case that the situation gets hot.

titansrule · #6 (**permalink**) 07-20-2006

That guy did the right thing in my opinion.

I was never spanked...But my dad was/is never around. Now I dont see him at all. So I dont know the effects and what not. But without doubt, hitting a two year old like that is just plain wrong.

One of my brothers is two. Even thinking about it if it was him makes me wince.

I have never seen man to woman violence in person, not even my dad who was such a jerk to my mum. So I dont know how I would react.

But I think what Cash said is true, you step in for someone who cant defend themselves. So long as in doing so it doesnt endanger someone you love.

Chaos6 · #7 (**permalink**) 07-20-2006

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheBillster

I never have noticed a situation like that, but i think i would step in too.
Iam trying always to be the good guy, and in this case to make the woman stop beating her child is a good thing to do.

Would you ask him nicely to stop and try to discuss it with him in a peaceful manner?

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheBillster

But if the person who beats the child looks like strong or dangerous i might ask other persons for assistance for the case that the situation gets hot.

Would the person you ask for help from be an American?

-------------------------------------------------------

My take, physical punishment of your children is perfectly fine and healthy as long as it does not leave marks. But there is a limit to what you should do, however, I cant draw that line out for anyone.

I have rarely given my children spankings that were actually painful, but I do spank them, never with a belt, always with my hand. Usually I make them turn around and put their hands in front of them and then give them one or two smacks on the rear. Usually its no more than what you would give when "Play Spanking" a child, but its enough to get their attention and let them know you are serious without all the yelling and screaming crap.

I have also "popped" my children in the mouth for talking back. Just a smack on the lips with the fingers, no fist or anything like that, but hard enough to get their attention.

As for the lady in the artical... I would say that if the accounting by the author is accurate then she was way over board and he should have stepped in.

Tigam · #8 (**permalink**) 07-20-2006

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chaos6

As for the lady in the artical... I would say that if the accounting by the author is accurate then she was way over board and he should have stepped in.

I would like to promote that statement... Some people, certainly news and media, like to... Umm.. embellish.

ripperjd · #9 (**permalink**) 07-20-2006

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chaos6

Would you ask him nicely to stop and try to discuss it with him in a peaceful manner?

Would the person you ask for help from be an American?

For ****'s sake guys, Billster has an opinion about one subject... try to leave it to that subject. I think he has already gotten the point you are trying to make here. If you want to continue driving that point home, try to keep it in that forum.

As for this... most of what needed to be said has been said. There is always a grey area. If I saw this lady hitting a kid like that, I'd say, "knock it off." If she reacted the way she did in the article and kept hitting the kid, I'd yell for someone to call 911, cause I'd end up holding her down till the authorities got there.

As much as I would like to, I wouldn't beat the person down, man or woman, because that isn't my job. Punishment should be determined by the authorities. Detaining them should be as far as it should go if it comes to that. If while detaining, the person gets loose and starts attacking me... then I'd use as much force as nessessary to stop them from doing so.
--------------- Madden 2007 Next Gen football ---------
I guess I didn't really answer the question.

To me, it's a matter of "appropriate force". If the force being used on the kid is appropriate, then I don't see a reason to step in. If it is inappropriate, then something should be done to make the person stop.

*cash-fixed bad quote tags*

TheBillster · #10 (**permalink**) 07-20-2006

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chaos6

Would you ask him nicely to stop and try to discuss it with him in a peaceful manner?

Of course. Why to be violent if it can be solved the peaceful way

But then again, if discussing is senseless and do have to get active. After you tried to solve the problem in a peaceful way...

Quote:

Would the person you ask for help from be an American?

Why not, even Israelian or Palestine. Or even Germans and French. Or even Iraqi and North Korean... Why not, as long as the kid getd helped...
--------------- Madden 2007 Next Gen football ---------

Quote:

Originally Posted by ripperjd

Would you ask him nicely to stop and try to discuss it with him in a peaceful manner?

For ****'s sake guys, Billster has an opinion about one subject... try to leave it to that subject. I think he has already gotten the point you are trying to make here. If you want to continue driving that point home, try to keep it in that forum.

Thanks Ripper, but it is like it is. For him I am 'Americas least wanted' guy, an "old Europe" guy, a Hippy, a Terrorist Sympathizer and even worser ... Iam smiling about it.
I said what i wanted to about this topics. I am finished with it and wont re-enter discussing them.

cashpath · #11 (**permalink**) 07-20-2006

Quote:

For ****'s sake guys, Billster has an opinion about one subject... try to leave it to that subject.

hmmm subject or thread? Cause I think the subject is the same... 'How would you deal with a conflict that is happening around you but you are not directly invloved in?'

I think Chaos was just wondering if Billster applied the same principles to every conflict or just certain ones..

ripperjd · #12 (**permalink**) 07-20-2006

yes, yes... semantics aside... it just seems that everytime Billster trys to enter a debate, his prior comments get thrown in his face. That's beside the fact that his views have been so skewed by others that it's like a characticher (sp?). As if no matter what he says, it will always add up to him being a wimp, just because he thinks that war isn't always the best option.

I just don't want to see him leave the board just because everyone can't get over the fact that he actually believes that it's possible to settle a dispute without distroying an entire country.